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Even worse, the report found some sex workers internalized the stigma of their profession and viewed themselves as deserving of punishment and abuse from their partners. Almost ten years ago, when I first stopped drinking and was just getting out of the sex industry, I fell into a relationship with a man who made me feel ashamed of my then-recent past.Mike* had plenty of baggage of his own, beginning but not ending with an unshakeable drug habit.Dave was, I thought, what I’d always been looking for: a guy who could look my mother in the eye.Then, a year later, I started working as a stripper to pay for college.

Almost invariably, they concluded I must have deep-seated psychological issues that meant our relationship would never become serious.That relationship taught me that “I don’t have a problem with what you used to do for money, just don’t ever talk about it” wasn’t good enough for me.When I started dating online, I knew I wanted to discuss my sex work past — and everything else — with anyone I got serious with.Maybe they were sorry for themselves, realizing they probably weren’t going to get laid if they didn’t want to take the relationship further.On at least one date, though, the opposite happened: The guy was obviously titillated, drooling for details like he’d stumbled upon a living, breathing character out of a Penthouse Forum Letter of the Month.Before my husband and I met, I worked on and off as a stripper through college, and then as a call girl on Craigslist for a brief stint when I was in grad school.