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In 1 Corinthians 7:3 and following, Paul says once we are married, our bodies literally belong to our spouse; he also instructs spouses to meet one another's sexual needs and to be together regularly so as to protect ourselves from falling into ungodly lust and extramarital sexual activity.If you have any doubts about God's intention to give us sex as a wonderful, pleasurable gift, Song of Songs should put them to rest.It might have been last night or last week or last year or back in high school or college.Would you describe whatever you did as "holy and honorable," or was it done to satisfy the "passionate lust" of you or your partner or both (1 Thessalonians 4:4-5)?It is certainly true that no passage of Scripture says — in so many words, at least — "thou shalt not kiss before marriage." Having said that, I submit that there is a strong argument to be made from Scripture that there is sexual relationship outside of marriage.The argument becomes clearer when we look at some of what the Bible has to say about 1) sex, 2) our relationships with other believers and 3) sexual immorality itself.Whatever you did, as you now think about it, does it inspire a comfortable peace or an uncomfortable shudder to remember that Father, Son and Holy Spirit observed it all?Do you believe God was glorified or grieved by what He saw? I can tell you from literally hundreds of emails and personal conversations that the only people who really attempt to justify premarital sexual involvement (with a few exceptions for "just kissing") are those who would like to engage in it in the future or who are currently engaging in it.

Therefore, he who rejects this instruction does not reject man but God, who gives you his holy spirit." Look closely at verse 6.In Song of Songs, God has given us a holy and beautiful picture of a marital sexual relationship, and everyone seems to be having an excellent time.Even there, however, God is clear that sex is "Do not arouse or awaken love before it so desires." (Song of Songs 2:7).We all know what we're talking about here, and these are not the things I mean to address in this column.The game changes when two people are romantically involved or "semi-involved" (a fascinating phrase I recently heard). Before you start throwing things at your computer, let's go to Scripture.Some translations render the word "wrong" as "defraud." To defraud someone is to deceive that person — in this context, to imply a commitment that does not exist by committing acts with someone that are appropriate only in the context of a particular relationship (i.e., marriage) to satisfy my own "passionate lust." To commit sexual immorality with and against someone, far from showing the "love" to which Scripture calls all believers, is to act like those "who do not know God," and this passage calls such acts "sin." Now, one obvious counterargument to the point I intend to make is that the Scriptures I've cited above just beg the question of what behaviors violate those passages.